Standing Like a Flamingo

I can obey God. I understand this concept quite simply. He tells me what to do and what not to do and I can clearly choose to obey or not to. I find His rules in the Word of God...not just the law but throughout all scriptures He has commanded us to follow Him. Although, I may not want to obey all the "rules," I do concede that they are good for me. You should know that in fact, I love rules. Structure has always been key to my life. Rules set a precedence, a requirement/standard if you must. They are the foundation of boundaries. In fact, I can even use scripture to support the need for order....1 Corinthians 14:40 Let all things be done decently and in order.

Even with my passion to abide by the "rules" and to "Obey God", I find myself finding it much more difficult to Trust in Him. I know the verses of Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. I have heard the lyrics, "I will walk by faith even when I cannot see." I meditate on these and ask God to allow them to be true in my heart. God has led me to have studied out how to abide in Christ thru John 15 so that Christ can be most glorified. Yet still, when a storm blows in, when a trial hits me in the face, as tribulation enters my life.... I find myself on shaky ground.

If Christ, is my Rock, my Salvation, my Foundation, why can I not stand fast in the faith. Why do I waiver like a two year old trying to do a flamingo-stand? It is simply that I do not fully trust in God and His sovereignty. It is that not everything has been fully surrendered...it is that I still think that maybe I have something to do with this.

Yet I can't help but be reminded that "It has never occurred to God that He is not me!"

May God continue to speak to my heart clearly and continue to challenge me to search His Word for the answers that are still waiting for me to discover so that I may "Trust In Him."